Introducing Saskia

As the tome lies in the hands of a couple more readers, I lie in wait for the feedback. I'm not even nervous about it this time. I think having shared it around a bit already, I'm used to putting a piece of my heart and soul out there. Just goes to show you can grow accustomed to anything. Now I'm just excited to hear back from the readers, and grateful to them for taking time out of their busy lives to look it over. 

No rest for the wicked, so now to interview the protagonist: the star of the story, Saskia Brookes.

Me: 'So what did you get up to at the weekend, Saskia?'

Saskia: 'Not a lot. There was homework, Youth Group, church - morning and evening services, door-knocking for Red Cross and I worked on my cross-stitch. I hope to achieve more next weekend.'

Me: 'That sounds like a lot - how do you find time for friends and perhaps dating?'

Saskia: 'I've been praying a lot in the hope that I can find my purpose in life - whether that is to be healer, prophet or what, I don't know. If I'm dedicated enough, I might hear God talk to me. Then I'll have a vision of the one I'm destined to marry. A shortcut though, would be for him to just have the vision of me. That'd be quicker. He's already amazing enough to be properly tuned into The Man Above, after all. Um, oh, sorry. I mean... Hypothetically speaking. Eliza is about the only friend I can fit into my schedule, and dating... Isn't that something people in American movies do?'

Me: 'Woah. You have someone in mind then?'

Saskia, blushing: 'No. I mean, maybe. Of course it's not for me to try to predict who God has in mind for me, it's just... Some prayer at my end might steer Him in the right direction. Wait, that sounds terrible. Scrap that bit. You know, I'm doing a bunny cross-stitch right now. Once it's done I might sew it to a cushion. I don't know though, maybe that's lame...'

Me: 'I interviewed Eliza a few weeks back. She didn't seem the cross-stitch type. What do you two do when you hang out together?'

Saskia: 'Um... I haven't seen a lot of her lately but we have a blast together - we like to watch Rage and make fun of the film clips. She loves dress-ups and wigs, so we usually have these whacky fashion parades, along with my little sister. Then they dance to some kinda music that Eliza hates but Lexie loves while I catch up on my cross-stitch. Well, that's what used to happen, at least.' *shrugs*

Me: 'You miss hanging out with her?'

Saskia: 'It's fine, really. I mean, I'm following the path God has in mind for me, so that's the most important thing. It's like in Proverbs 3:6 - 'Let God direct your steps.' I'm not too good at deciphering these directions yet, but I trust I'll get there. As soon as I'm given a map.'

Me: 'Right. What will you do if you don't get a map?'

Saskia: 'I'll get a map, okay? (Huffy now) I can be patient. It's a metaphorical map, by the way. You know that, right?'

Me: 'I know that, I just wondered-'

Saskia: 'I don't have time for this. I need to feed the neighbour's cat, edit the church newsletter, make a care package for my sponsor child and bake some goodies for the Youth Group's Progressive Dinner tonight. Oh and I'll have to whip up something for the main too - Monique's sick.'

Me: 'Sorry, I'll let you be on your way. Thanks so much for your time.'

Saskia: 'No, I'm sorry. I was out of line. Want to come along to the Progressive Dinner tonight?'

Me: 'No thanks, that's fine.'

Saskia: 'Maybe you'd like to come along to the evening service next Sunday? It's quite fun and loose, I think you'd like it.'

Me: 'Okay, Progressive Dinner it is.'

Saskia: 'Great! See you tonight. We meet at the church. See you later!' *rushes off*

The Church of Book Sniffers

Theres something about bumping into someone who's had a similar epiphany to me. Nothing turns acquaintances into friends more quickly than having shared a similar, unique experience. I don't think becoming disillusioned with knob jockeys disguised as Christians is truly unique, but finding others to discuss it openly with seems strangely unique. For the most part, most people I know are either religious, or puzzled as to why anyone would ever voluntarily be religious. There's also that group that don't give two hoots but they're technically religious for traditional, superstitious or social purposes.  

Me: I was in it for all the right reasons, I believe. I wanted to be close to God, to follow my purpose and to raise my children 'right'. I wanted to believe that I was immortal.

The major thing me and my friend have in common is that we became fed up with being treated like moronic children who had no hope of doing anything useful with our lives. Or at least, not achieving anything worthwhile unless we adhered to their distinct, unique set of rules.

One of my faults was that I wasn't  attending church often enough. I was eventually informed that 'babies need to wean in order to grow' or something like that, and that the only way to grow in God is to spend every spare moment at the church. To me, it was a cult, in retrospect. Modern churches can't possibly have the whole congregation co-habiting commune-style, so the next best thing is to have members neglect their own lives and earthly families in order to serve the church. When we failed to do that, we fucked with their system. (Hurrah to that!)

Yes, I say fuck now and yes, it is in direct rebellion towards the church. Not because I'm badass, but because the world is in such peril that me cursing is the least of its problems. And don't give me that sympathetic 'You're lost and you're going to hell' look either!

I think us reformed Christians are reluctant to discuss our situations because a) it seems disrespectful to our loved ones who faithfully follow God and b) we feel, perhaps, that we failed somehow, and c) most talk is cheap and small. 

I'm at the point where I don't feel I failed, I feel I overcame! If only certain Christians could realise their own failings; that in their heroic bids to keep us heretics on the straight and narrow, they often push us away.

Some of us question authority. Some of us get divorced. Some of us have babies out of wedlock. Some of us are gay. Some of us even swear! We're human. It's nice for us to find a like-minded humans who perhaps still honour God but have decided church is toxic.

I look forward to a cuppa and a bitch with this lady. At least I can admit I bitch about things sometimes. Some people don't want you to do grown-up things like bitch about your sitch or just fucking swear. Do it anyway. If you want to. You're a grown up; it's your choice.

I've weaned, but not in the way they would've liked. Now I attend the church of 'standing in the street, talking to someone who totally gets you.' It's like when you find a group of writers who love non-supernatural young adult fiction/vintage clothing/musical theatre/80s music/sniffing books/clothes dryer fluff/Degrassi. It's finding that seemingly non-existent niche and feeling like you have comrades.

That's one cult I'd consider going all communal for.

Waggin' Tongues

I read a lot of writing advice articles and listen to a lot of podcasts on the topic too. In fact, I'm kinda obsessed. It's my Candy Crush, I guess you could say. A few of these vlogs and blogs suggested reading the dialogue you've written out loud to make sure it flows well and sounds natural.

Now that 1 1/2 beta readers have given me feedback on my manuscript, (beta two is on the case) I'm concentrating on doing just this. I have tweaked a lot of dialogue as a result. I've read over the manuscript so many times that I can't bring myself to look at anything BUT the dialogue!

Being a fan of Gilmore girls, I have a thing for long, wordy, humouros dialogue. It doesn't always work though. I go by the general rule that if I get tongue-tied while reading it aloud, I may need to re-think it. Plus, I leave that sort of dialogue to Saskia and Eliza, the two smartest characters in the book. Being besties, they almost have their own unique language that no one else could quite fathom. (A bit like Lorelai and Rory? Maybe.)

A lot of the culling has consisted of removing a whole bunch of 'g''s. See, some characters enjoy 'goin' down the pub and 'avin' a piss-up, maaate.' These characters live in a small Australian town; they can't all be masters of the spoken word! I'm allowed to say this, bein' from Swan 'ill and still speakin' that way 'alf the time!

Reading my work aloud makes me feel closer to the work and the characters.  I almost feel like I can imagine the novel as a movie when I act it out - it's exhilarating! 

I do feel a bit silly if my husband or kids enter the room while I'm technically talking (often arguing) with myself, but that's okay. I just keep on truckin' and censor the swearing if the littl'uns are present!

One of my online writing advisors recommended drinking tea and sucking lozenges as you read aloud. It's great advice - it's amazing how quickly the voice starts to falter when you're literally speaking for everyone.

Dialogue is what I do best, so using this technique to make it even better is my new favourite thing. And if it does become a screenplay one day, then the actors might appreciate the work I put in!

Well, I'm off to wash some dishes. I'm quite good at that too, since I started listening to writing podcasts while I scrub.